I

Posted on by george jeffry

I18N:

Either IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN or INNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN, I can’t decide.

I.E.E.E.:

  1. Institute of Electrical and Electronics Engineers.
  2. Real engineers capable of real havoc using real physics.

IIS:

  1. Microsoft® web server software. 
  2. Software residing on the World Wide Web that states, “I Is!”
  3. Security breach in your enterprise inviting adolescent criminals to corrupt your sensitive data and reveal your innermost business secrets.

Impedance Mismatch

  1. Term lifted from electrical engineering to describe the trials and errors of forcing an Object-Oriented programmer, in an Object-Oriented Language to use T-SQL or other data-access scripting languages for CRUD.
  2. In electrical engineering, impedance mismatches may work for a time but eventually let out the smoke. In programming, impedance mismatches don’t usually work as long.

Inheritance:

  1. Getting a whole lot of something (you know not what), from someone (you knew not well), with the expectation that it is a boon (you know not why).
  2. DNA therapy for programs.
  3. Financial boon, usually exacted by death of someone near to us, with inverse proportion of dearness to amount.

If any of us had one, we wouldn’t be here, doing this.

Installer:

  1. Specialized application that takes all the guesswork out of corrupting your machine.
  2. Fellow at the store who can make the correct decisions when re-installing the software that corrupted your system.

Integrated Development Environment (IDE):

  1. An application which combines the major and minor tools and environments to homogeneously impede the developer during programming.
  2. Programmatic exoskeleton within which an editor, compiler, linker, and all other tools run, giving the appearance of interaction while hiding the truth behind pretty presentation..
  3. Ad-hoc language tutor for the lazy developer.
  4. Environment where a programmer may both code a program and crash it without switching apps.
  5. Suffix denoting an oxidized ion, chloride, sulfide, old bromide.
  6. Crutch.

Integration:

  1. Expanding scope beyond domain boundaries to ensure unending requirements in my limited project.
  2. Court ordered bussing of data across domains.

Interface:

  1. An abstract structure that allows disparate objects to be confused for someone else.
  2. The ambiguous netherworld where vastly different media intersect where neither have distinction nor either has dominance.
  3. A shoreline.

Internationalization:

  1. Overlaying lexicographic syntax and other patterns of inferior cultures in your application as a way of blunting the popular anti-American sentiment of a market that won’t buy your product anyway.
  2. Crippling applications in pursuit of cultural equivalence.

See I18N

Internet:

A once top-secret communications network now used to deliver pictures of nekkid people.

Intellectual Property:

Everything you’ve worked on for your company that is legally no longer yours.

Intuitive:

  1. Any topic beyond the cognitive grasp of even the most accomplished among us.
  2. Any series of facts so completely obscured by inconsequential detail that no conclusions could ever be drawn.
  3. Any UI whose Exit menu selection is so visually obfuscated that no user can turn it off except through the Task Manager by killing the process.

Inversion of Control:

Letting somebody else do it.

IoT

Internet of Things

  1. Connecting every thing and person onto the world wide interwebs without the slightest bother toward security.
  2. Embedding stalking software and listening devices in our appliances, and even fish tanks in an enticing ploy to get us to pay for our own tattletales and informers.
  3. Preparatory technical necessity for the full surveillance future.

There was of course no way of knowing whether you were being watched at any given moment. How often, or on what system, the Thought Police plugged in on any individual wire was guesswork. It was even conceivable that they watched everybody all the time. But at any rate they could plug in your wire whenever they wanted to. You had to live — did live, from habit that became instinct — in the assumption that every sound you made was overheard, and, except in darkness, every movement scrutinized.

1984, George Orwell


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